Here Come The Doctors

seejaneschlep

new lj. zomg.
doesn't really matter if you add it or not, just letting you know dears.

so I'm listening to my mother sing along to Bob Marley down the hall and it's quite amusing XD

I think Eric's the only one who reads this anymore.

In lieu of this, I am going to make a new livejournal once I come up with a good name. Then, I will proceed to pimp it out so a bunch of strangers can read about my life.

I like when other people read what I write. I like to write for the masses.

Hello hiatus.

EDIT: plus I've had this journal for almost 9 months. it's time my ADD kicked in.

right so after I type this very very quickly, I have to high-tail it back to la escuela for some AVID tutoring that I'm not getting paid for. 
I decided not to add Humanties [because spanish 3 was full] because with APUSH and Adv. Drama and Comedy Sportz and everything else, it would just be seizure-inducing.
I cut my bangs so now they run straight across my forehead and it looks supercool etc.
When I walked home today, there were three people in a car parked outside my cul-de-sac [did you know the plural of "cul-de-sac" is "culs-de-sac"?] and I walked past them and got "OWWW OWWW"'d at and a lovely "Come back here sweetheart!" also yelled at me. It really doesn't help that they were listening to Metallica or something and that I think I knew them from last year. 
And now, I bid you farewell.
Oh and we might be doing The Importance of Being Earnest for our Adv. Drama play this year :D
And I have to get a cavity filled at 4:30 today!!! Okay, that's my 60 seconds.

Well it wasn't too horrible. I do rather like both my classes. That's right guys, both. Stupid Mrs. Gelvis says to me during third block "You can't add my class, I have over 40 students." Well fuck lady, why not make two classes instead of one!? I want to take Spanish 3 this semester, goddammit. 

AP US History wasn't the terrible drag I expected it to be. I have Grace [from my dance class last year] in that class so it's alright as far as that bit goes. We basically have to read two chapters from our history books and a few pages from our other book a week which comes out to be around 60 pages a week. Say goodbye to ever seeing me again, basically. We have quizzes every Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday and a test and an essay every Friday. I do rather like my teacher though, Mr. Irvine. He's nice and respects your opinion if you disagree with him on something. The way he grades our essays, though, is a tad strange. We have to give him a cassette tape that's 90 minutes long and he records what his comments are onto it for us to listen to later. 

Advanced Drama is everything and everyone I love and more. Our musical this year is Footloose and, by God, I want to do it more this year than I did last year for Cabaret because Kevin Bacon is God in that movie. Oh 80's, you fiend. We haven't picked what play we're going to do yet but the fall play dates are November 2-4 so mark your calendars kittens. 

AVID Tutoring hasn't started yet and it won't until Thursday for me but I'm sure it'll be wonderful. Working with Freshmen, oh a more wonderous job I couldn't have picked.

Hmm, not much to report in the way of happenings in Claire's life. 

I'm going to school two times this week, before it even starts. Once on Thursday to fix my schedule and once on Friday to do Tutor Training! On Thursday, Melissa and I are going to flounce around downtown and watch Breakfast On Pluto/Donnie Darko because she has yet to see them. I don't see my school friends enough outside of school. I don't see Ariel enough either, and that makes me pretty sad. I think that's one of the things I'm going to try and do this year. See people more often. Which will be very hard to do seeing as how I have an insanely trying academic schedule but I will make it work [/timgunn]. 

As far as everything else is concerned, I'm quite happy with my situation. No crying over anything, no getting angry at people, hardly any bad emotions. I mean, I have them of course, but not to the degree or frequency as before. Only thing I'm upset about it the fact that a very large zit is sitting right atop the corner of my mouth and it's very noticable. Ohhh Picture Day should be a blast. But that's just a physical thing and it's hardly even that important. On the other hand, I would like to murder Panic! At the Disco and their horrible singer. Fucking catchy bastards. I bet they know it too. 

I think they & Brandon Flowers have two of the biggest egos in our wee genre of Electronica/Rock/Pop/etc.
Only difference is that I actually like The Killers.

My parents got married in 1983, about 3 months after they started working together on the East Coast. About 7 lovely years later, there I was all baby-like. I can't really remember too much about living in Maryland but I do remember my grandparents coming over a lot. We lived in a town-house; which is pretty much just a two story house with a basement. We moved to California in February 1994. I remember living in an apartment for a few months while we got enough money to buy the house I live in now. A lot of the things that happened in my early childhood I have video to remember them by. But all I really remember from living in this house then is my parents arguing. 

I remember trying to get my little four or five year old self in between them and put my hands up to tell them to stop yelling at each other. I remember getting in a car accident and coming home to my dad who was practically hysterical because he had no idea what happened. I remember going on a short walk down my street when I was five or six and coming back to my mom crying and my dad trying to explain that he wasn't going to be living with us anymore, but not because he didn't love me anymore. I remember other disjointed bits of my younger childhood like staring at the clock saying "7:00 PM" and wondering when my dad was because he was supposed to pick me up and we were supposed to go to the apartment he was living in. Sometimes I don't think he came but I don't really remember. I remember meeting Gail for the first time, before my parents seperated. She was wearing all blue and I was hiding behind my dad's leg. I remember meeting her again when my dad took me to her apartment and I stared angrily at a picture of her son when he was 10 that now hangs on the wall in their house. I remember driving to therapy and playing Chutes and Ladders with my therapist. A very Harriet the Spy-esque experiance. I remember the day the divorce finally came through, with my mom happier than ever and me sadder than ever because then I knew there was no hope for a Parent Trap-like reunion. I remember the day my dad and Gail told me they were engaged even though now, 10 years later, they're not married. I remember bits and pieces of it.

You've probably heard that song on the radio or MTV or somewhere else, "Where'd You Go?" by Fort Minor. I listened to it last night and it made me cry like nothing else ever had before. I've never really thought about my parents' divorce that much. For one thing, I didn't really understand it like I do now. I never really cried about it or let it affect me before because I just brushed it off as the past. Something that I couldn't change and, don't get me wrong, I still do but I just never actually sat down and thought about it before. This is in no way asking for pity or me pitying myself because I know lots of people in worse boats than I am. This is just a chance for me to get this out in writing because it's much easier for me to collect my thoughts this way than it is for me to collect them in my head. I think my posts will get more meaningful after school starts. More thinking, that sort of thing.

Stay Tuned.

Doubt thou the stars are fire,
Doubt that the sun doth move
Doubt truth to be a liar,
But never doubt I love.

Call me a romantic fool, which I'll admit to being on occasion, but I love Shakespeare. Cause, boy, that man was a ridiculously great writer. 
I finished CTC and it feels awesome to be done but I'm a bit sad that I won't get to wake up and go do something I love everyday. Doing plays and learning how to better my acting is just great. I love to do it because, no matter how stupid or cliche this is, it really builds my confedence. You know me, or maybe you don't, I'm little miss Nervous when it comes to doing anything in front of other people. Instead of this, I get to spend a good portion of my day [eight AM to four PM] for four days [monday-thurs] at Driver's Education. 
I wish to return to Seattle at the moment because I had a dream that I lived there and my dreams are questionably realistic. I miss taking the bus and not having hobos on it. The pretty weather and the cheap food. Mmm cheap food. [insert daydream about muffins here]
*sigh*

So we're doing song in CTC. I think it's awesome. It makes me feel all crazy cool.

mhm I want to watch Fight Club again goddammit. 

It's been the hottest summer in the history of hot summers [according to the record breaking heat in the newspapers] and we owe it all the global warming. I'm seeing that Al Gore movie. I would personally like to know how soon my flesh will be hot enough to slip right off my bones. 

CTC is still going on but only until the end of the week and then, next week, I start Driver's Ed. Five fun days of a government-required class. Yay. Oh well, one step closer is one step better off than I was before so it's a good thing. Then I have a couple free days and then a DCFC/Mates Of State/Spoon show with my dearest Annette which is preceeded by senor Eric's [seventeeth o.o] birthday. On August 18th I have this training thing for that tutoring program I wanted to do next year [for money of course]. Then directly after that, on the same day, I have to fly to Los Angeles for my cousin Chris' wedding on August 19th at noon. 

And then, two days later, I start junior year my friends. 
Yes,. in exactly twenty-eight [28] days, I will be in 11th grade.
Holy fucking shit that's soon.
Stay Tuned.

my darling cousin [well second cousin but who's counting?] came over yesterday with my aunt. and they both stayed the night becaus technically my aunt lives here. I had to share my [not looking so big now] bed with a kicky ADHD seven year old. Yeah ouch. 

I should probably be taking a shower but I'm too lazy to actually get off my lazy ass and clean myself. 

Whoa, I said "lazy" twice.
Fuck I'm tired.

And I'm going to be cooped up in a church [without air conditioner] for 7 1/2 hours and I've just read the weather report, which said it's going to be 91 degrees on this lovely day. I'm starting to detest summer with a fiery passion. I want the warm to get out and the cold to come back. At least when you're cold, you can put more layers on. When you're hot, all you can do is get naked and if you're still warm, you can't take off your skin or anything like that. 

I say we take a Seattle road trip yeah?

ZOMG! I have my lovely ol' computer back now. 

I started CTC on Wednesday and it's awesome. We're doing Robyn Hood, with a 'y' because it's a girl and all this other adapted shit. My character's name is Little John. *smacks forehead* Yes, I will be getting crunk in this play of mine. 

Right now I probably should be doing my APUSH essay but it's really not that much. Instead, I am reaping the benefits of technology at my fingertips and drinking a Diet Coke with Lime. 

I want it to be fall/winter again because, dammit, I want to buy clothes for that season. Yes, I know "Claire? Wants to buy clothes?! What?!!?" But I'm not turning into a mall-hopping, Abercrombie-wearing whore, I swear. They're nice clothes from Delia's, which I absolutely love now. I go through different weird clothing phases. I had "black" in 8th grade, "emo-ish" in 9th, "desperately trying to be kinda scene but would never admit it" in 10th and I want to have something different and more mature looking for 11th. 
What can I say? It's fun to reinvent yourself.

does it bother anyone but me that my favorite song right now is by a guy was in the top 3 in Australian Idol?
Just a thought.

My god, is it July already!? Just a year ago I was at Warped Tour, partying with the homies. And now I'm here, typing on my mom's work labtop, playing solitare until I get Carpool Tunnel Syndrome.

I am also required to take notes on eight [8] chapters of a forty-one [41] chapter US History book this summer. And I have to write an essay on parts of it by July Fourteenth [14].

Pretty much nothing to report except that I went to Annette's house last night & saw The Devil Wears Prada and let me tell you, it's pretty hilarious. Far be it from me to actually like most chick flicks but, hey, it's the estrogen right? It was such a chick flick, in fact, that we went on opening night and there were only about thirty-four [34] men out of two-hundred [200] people. That's seventeen [17] percent [%]. Yikes. 

Eek, I'm jazzed about Warped Tour ['06] on Saturday. More than just the bands [Hellogoodbye, MCS, Zebrahead] I love the atmosphere. Too bad I only have like twenty [20] dollars. That's okay, several people I know are going who I'm sure will give me money if I beg for about three [3] hours for it. 

I want to go to the Embarcadero & The Modern Art Museum in San Francisco again. But Melissa's working and she's my buddy for it. *sigh* The corporate system strikes again.

Ohhhh yeah, I went to my sorta-kinda friend Alex's house on Thursday for her birthday party. We watched Kill Bill Vol. 2. I like that movie too much. Cause normally I wouldn't like a movie that violent [all though the first one is worse]. Maybe it's just because Daryl Hannah's pretty hot. Anyhow, stay tuned.

hah so Claire's watching the Project Runway marathon on BRAVO and she completely blames Annette for it. {+ a little bit of Daniel V.] 

I need a new camera, STAT. mine seriously sucks ass. It's so fucking bulky and huge and silver and ugly. I want a smaller camera with better resolution. I suppose I'll have to wait until my birthday to have some cash[money] to buy one with. 

Speaking of cameras, would anyone be willing to let me take pictures of them? Cause, honestly, you guys are all pretty hot. And I really want to just do someone's hair/makeup/clothes/etc. and just take pictures of them. I know it's pretty much a ton to ask but come on, humour me. :]

I'm also back from Santa Barbara as of yesterday although I still have to be at my dad's house until Sunday per our usual weekend thing. And I've just been sitting around all day doing nothing. And watching bits of Unfaithful and seeing more of Diane Lane than I ever wanted to.

*sigh* my vacation is almost over. Today is basically my last day in Santa Barbara. I'm not all that sad about leaving but it is nice to have cable whenever I want it and the beach 2 blocks away. 

I passed by a church today called "Our Lady Of Sorrows" and giggled because of my 9th grade mind referencing My Chemical Romance for me. Plus I was wearing the sweater with lyrics of that song. I bought fabulous presents for everyone as well and a lovely book for myself called "101 Things To Do Before You Die" complete with checklists and elaborations. I think I'll shoot for completing about 30 of them. Cause you know me, big risk taker and all. [/sarcasm] 

We're going to dinner on the warf tonight. Break out your skirt and heels Claire, it's swanky resturant time. A perfect place to be scolded by the evil [kinda sort of but not really since she and my dad aren't actually married] stepmother. For god knows what but she'll find something to complain about.

I'll post pictures when I actually have the time. Farewell & stay tuned.

I depart for Cambria [har har Coheed & Cambria] and Santa Barbara tomorrow with my dad and stepmom. And I'll basically be there until Friday. Five days of hardly anything except for beach-ness. Which I plan to spend reading my lovely books and building sandcastles. 

And, of course, catching the occasional wave on my boogie board which is really just a glorified piece of styrofoam.

I like the beach, I really do. I just completely dislike the sight of my stepmother in a bikini. She is fifty-nine after all.

[insert repulsed shudder here]

Anyhow, if you'd like to contact me, do call me as I will be starved of attention from anyone under 50. Hell, even text me even though it costs like five dollars per text. I plan to have my phone with me like an extra appendage.

In other news, I'm quite a happy camper. It's summer, things are going well and Warped Tour/CTC are next month. Yay.

Hmm, summer. I do vote in favour of it. No waking up at 6 AM, jumping in the shower, blow drying my hair, then quickly slapping on some clothes and running to school and usually forgetting to eat breakfast. S'ok though I like routine but it's nice not to have to rush and flip out every morning 5 days a week. Although I am at a loss with what to do from about 8-11 AM cause no one's up and my mom's at work. So if any of you happen by chance to be awake between those lovely hours, do call me because chances are I'll be watch soap operas/that one show with Matt Lauer & Katie Couric that I can't remember the name of. 

Not sure why nearly everyone I know [of] is de-virginatizing themselves. Can't you wait? You're only 14/15/16 for chrissakes. *sigh* Not sure I get this whole "rave" lifestyle either. What's so taking ecstacy and dancing until you, quite literally, drop to the ground to techno music? I can do that at home without the drugs and near-death experiances, thanks. 

On yet another note:

"I've got the world on a string
Sitting on a rainbow
Got the string around my finger
What a world, what a life - I'm in love
I've got a song that I sing
I can make the rain go
Any time I move my finger
Lucky me, can't you see - I'm in love
Life's a wonderful thing
As long as I hold the string
I'd be a silly so-and-so
If I should ever let go"

To all the people that do this:

/
And think they'll look like this:

/
I'd say it's more of this:

Wise up, smoking cigarettes will kill you. You will get black lung/cancer and die. You don't look cool, you look stupid.

I could make a big fat entry about how the last day of school was touching. I could make a big fat entry about how I got a C in Geometry and nearly cried right then and there cause I was praying to every god I knew, Greek and Roman included, that I'd pass that class. I could make a big fat entry about the song that my English teacher sang/played guitar to/wrote about graduating high school. But instead, I'm going to make a somewhat medium-sized entry about the things I plan to do this summer/junior year.

Summer:
>Go to Santa Barbara and figure out just how exactly to surf properly
>Go to CTC and get better at acting
>Read at least 10 books (yeah I've done this before, don't underestimate me)
>Floss every day
>Write more 
>Study for my SATs

Junior Year:
>Get a 4.0 just about every grading period
>Become an AVID tutor, officially
>Get a job elsewhere like Borders or something akin to it
>Get a good computer like a labtop 
>Discover new and amazingly awesome bands/singers and become Indie Queen**

**Only half kidding

Am I insane for half-way liking Missy Elliot?

I bought underwear today. This is not really that important but it humanizes me.

From crazy with love.

There's only 4 more days of my sophomore year of high school. Yikes. I mean, honestly, I only have 2 years until I graduate high school.

Graduate high school

Alright, take me in freshman year and take me now and I am really not even near to the same person. I have no friends from middle school. Every last person that was in my group then, I have had either 

a. no contact with
or
b. basically got rid of them as a friend

I can seriously say that I love the person I am/becoming. I wouldn't have it any other way. Well, alright, yes I would like to be able to drive sooner than I will be but, hey, can't have everything. 

And I know maybe about 3 people read this but you guys mean the world to me. Actually no, the world is too small. I would be a way worse person without you three. Don't pretend not to know who you are. 

A year ago, I'd be embarrassed to admit that I actually still kind of liked Blink 182 because it reminded me of good stuff. Now, who cares? My opinion is my opinion. A year ago, I'd never dream of speaking up in class. A year ago, the opposite sex and relationships in general scared the fuck out of me. A year ago, I wouldn't listen to something if it wasn't personally recommended by either AP magazine or MySpace or even Ariel for that matter. A year ago, I judged people on what kind of music they listened to and the clothes they wore. But those people I judged are some of my best friends ever now.

A year ago, I would've never told anyone any of that.

So what if I sound a bit faux-philosophical?
I like it sometimes.